Halloween is coming up and you don't have to spend a lot to make a kick ass Halloween costume! Being cheap can make you creative ...or you can spend at least $60 on one of these...
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| Clown Fish $59.95, Dolphin $69.95, Shark $119.95, Scuba Diver $69.96, Frog $149.95 on Yandy.com |
Imagine you're at a party and you saw one of these girls. You go up to her and ask, "What are you dressed up as?" She responds, "A clownfish, duh!"
Okay, I'll give the scuba diver credit (it even comes with a tank), maybe the furry frog. Honestly, these costumes aren't even that slutty, but the sole purpose of the costume is to look sexy... not to be a dolphin or a shark. I'm sick of these unnecessarily sexed-up costumes and I'm not the only one. Check out this tumblr: Fuck No Sexist Halloween Costumes, which received 300+ followers in its first day. That was only four days ago. They like to compare the generally more accurate and de-sexualized, goofy men's costume to the terrible sexy female costumes.
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| I'm Oscar the Grouch, because he was my favorite character as a kid! It only cost me $61.95! |
These costumes come from Yandy.com. And by the way, it looks unsurprisingly, but totally amusingly, like a porn site.
There are product videos, like the above, for every item. If you need help, you can chat with someone live. There are categories for lingerie and "sexy Halloween costumes" as if they're not all like this. Their other categories are Group Costumes, Couple Costumes, Animal Costumes... but no matter what, almost all the costumes are described as "Sexy _____" in their title. I don't think they know how to categorize either. Ironically, these are costumes for (mostly) women to wear, but the website is geared towards men. Are we supposed to want to buy these costumes, because men like them? ...Yeah, I think that's what they're getting at.
I refuse to wear a tube dress and leg warmers and call it a costume. ...Unless I dress up as a Typical Halloween Costume... somehow...
It took me awhile to accept the lack of costume options for Asian girls. I dressed up as Christina Aguilera when I was in Jr. High obtaining a blonde wig. I'm scared to see the pictures. We all know, I didn't look like Christina (pre Xtina), no matter how much eye make up I put on. I since resolved this problem by excluding myself to costumes of only Asian characters or putting more emphasis on the visual concepts than looking like the real person. It started with Sally.
Character: Sally's from one of my favorite artistically-dark kids movies... you know, just one of them. (I was a strange kid.) She is a rebellious, sneaky, daring, and sly rag doll yearning for adventure. But she is still caring and tender. She saves the lead, Jack Skeleton, just as he saves her.
Costume: My mom and I made a black and white patched dress. I made some of my own patches as well, using white fabric and black sharpies to create abstract designs. Then I simply took black lipstick and drew rag doll scars on my arms, legs, and my mouth. The most I spent was on the fabric.
Go-Go Yubari "Kill Bill"
Character: Being O'Ren's body guard, this seemingly sweet innocent girl in a catholic school girl outfit is actually insane. Go-go battles the lead, Black Mamba, with her weapon of choice, a spiked metal ball on chain. Go-go swings the ball over her head and into the wall and traps Black Mamba with the chain. She twists it around her neck. Nearly choked to death, Black Mamba finds a piece of wood with a rusty nail and stabs her foot then wacks it in her head. Go-go drops the chain, blood tears pour from her eyes, and she falls to the ground.
Costume: I bought the jacket and skirt from Salvation Army. I used a nerf ball, foam clay, and a real chain (from Home Depot) to make the spiked ball and chain. Finally, I bought the fake blood.
In Senior year, I literally dressed up as a prostitute. Okay, well, not your typical one.
Female "Sin City"
Character: Most of the females in Frank Miller's graphic novel turned feature film, Sin City were damn-the-man prostitutes. They were each equipped with weapons and chains. The cops left them alone as long as there was peace between the two, keeping the pimps and the mobs out of the system. But when a disgustingly horny and chauvinistic pushy off-duty cop takes it too far with a prostitute, he gets killed. The girls worry, "It'll be the bad old days, all over again. The pimps, the beatings, the drugs, the rapes..."
Costume: Mimicking the mostly black and white film's visual motif, I dressed up in grey-scale, put white make up on my face, and wore red lipstick as the classic accent mark. Makes we want to throw a Sin City party.
Side note: I was at the Cinder Clause parade last year, seeing hundreds of people in red and white Santa Clause costumes... but then I saw a guy wearing what I thought was a dark grey Santa costume and I thought I went color blind for a second. I felt like Jonah in the Giver ...except instead of being in a black and white world, I was in a color world.
In 2009, my friends and I went to the Misfits concert. I had to choose something I could feasibly wear at a punk rock concert without dying of sweat, knocking people down with fairy wings or something, and could safely riot in the mosh pit.
Costume: So, I dressed up as a hand-made/voodoo doll. I bought a pair of white tights and made a mask out of it. I took my large button earrings and sewed them in for the eyes. I cut out a mouth and then took thick black string and sewed the lips. I cut the back of the mask so my hair could come out the back. I wore the legs of the tights on my arms and hands, taking away my fingers. And then finally, I wore a black top and black tutu skirt to parties and jeans to the show. I ended up taking on and off the mask, but it worked. Some random dude took a photo of me in the subway. I was also told at a party, "I both love and hate your costume, because it scares the hell out of me!" Excellent.
Mal "Inception"
Character: In 2010,
I dressed as the lover and femme-fatal, Mal, from Inception. Exotic and beautiful, she was the love of Cobb's life in one world and, racked with guilt, the enemy in his dream world.
Costume: It certainly was not my greatest attempt. I drew a maze on myself like the Inception logo, drew Cobb's totem on my hand, and walked around with one shoe as if it had fallen off when I was sitting outside on a window sill convinced reality was a dream.
Doll "Dollhouse"
Character: Last year, I dressed up as a doll from Joss Whedon's show, Dollhouse. The show features around this underground corporation that takes "volunteers" and programs them into human dolls in exchange for 5 unconscious years of their lives and money that would set them for life. They partake in engagements with clients that usually are looking for a love interest (again, I dressed up as a partial prostitute.) But sometimes they were asked to be spies or investigators in crime. They were programmed with amazing fighting and analytical skills. In one sense they can fend for themselves as dolls, and another they're trapped. When they're in a "sleep state," having zero personality chips and skills, they're in a daze. They're like children with less energy and intelligence. So, when a serial killer, Alpha, gets loose and slashes the dolls faces, they're left traumatized, confused and helpless poking dead bodies, telling their bodyguards, "They won't wake up."
Costume: Fake fresh scars, mainstream make up, lacy tank top, skinny jeans, and healed boots. I was working on a film set that day, so I kept it minimal. I wanted to look attractive, but creepy, and ready to kick butt. Because of my scars, I'd actually get people asking me, "What happened to you?" "Bad weekend..." And then I'd walk away with their mouths gaped. My friends would have to reassure them that it was just make up.
There are product videos, like the above, for every item. If you need help, you can chat with someone live. There are categories for lingerie and "sexy Halloween costumes" as if they're not all like this. Their other categories are Group Costumes, Couple Costumes, Animal Costumes... but no matter what, almost all the costumes are described as "Sexy _____" in their title. I don't think they know how to categorize either. Ironically, these are costumes for (mostly) women to wear, but the website is geared towards men. Are we supposed to want to buy these costumes, because men like them? ...Yeah, I think that's what they're getting at.
I refuse to wear a tube dress and leg warmers and call it a costume. ...Unless I dress up as a Typical Halloween Costume... somehow...
It took me awhile to accept the lack of costume options for Asian girls. I dressed up as Christina Aguilera when I was in Jr. High obtaining a blonde wig. I'm scared to see the pictures. We all know, I didn't look like Christina (pre Xtina), no matter how much eye make up I put on. I since resolved this problem by excluding myself to costumes of only Asian characters or putting more emphasis on the visual concepts than looking like the real person. It started with Sally.
Sally "Nightmare Before Christmas"
Character: Sally's from one of my favorite artistically-dark kids movies... you know, just one of them. (I was a strange kid.) She is a rebellious, sneaky, daring, and sly rag doll yearning for adventure. But she is still caring and tender. She saves the lead, Jack Skeleton, just as he saves her. Costume: My mom and I made a black and white patched dress. I made some of my own patches as well, using white fabric and black sharpies to create abstract designs. Then I simply took black lipstick and drew rag doll scars on my arms, legs, and my mouth. The most I spent was on the fabric.
Go-Go Yubari "Kill Bill"
Costume: I bought the jacket and skirt from Salvation Army. I used a nerf ball, foam clay, and a real chain (from Home Depot) to make the spiked ball and chain. Finally, I bought the fake blood.
In Senior year, I literally dressed up as a prostitute. Okay, well, not your typical one.
Female "Sin City"
Costume: Mimicking the mostly black and white film's visual motif, I dressed up in grey-scale, put white make up on my face, and wore red lipstick as the classic accent mark. Makes we want to throw a Sin City party.
Side note: I was at the Cinder Clause parade last year, seeing hundreds of people in red and white Santa Clause costumes... but then I saw a guy wearing what I thought was a dark grey Santa costume and I thought I went color blind for a second. I felt like Jonah in the Giver ...except instead of being in a black and white world, I was in a color world.
In 2009, my friends and I went to the Misfits concert. I had to choose something I could feasibly wear at a punk rock concert without dying of sweat, knocking people down with fairy wings or something, and could safely riot in the mosh pit.
Handmade/Voodoo Doll
Costume: So, I dressed up as a hand-made/voodoo doll. I bought a pair of white tights and made a mask out of it. I took my large button earrings and sewed them in for the eyes. I cut out a mouth and then took thick black string and sewed the lips. I cut the back of the mask so my hair could come out the back. I wore the legs of the tights on my arms and hands, taking away my fingers. And then finally, I wore a black top and black tutu skirt to parties and jeans to the show. I ended up taking on and off the mask, but it worked. Some random dude took a photo of me in the subway. I was also told at a party, "I both love and hate your costume, because it scares the hell out of me!" Excellent.Mal "Inception"
Costume: It certainly was not my greatest attempt. I drew a maze on myself like the Inception logo, drew Cobb's totem on my hand, and walked around with one shoe as if it had fallen off when I was sitting outside on a window sill convinced reality was a dream.
Doll "Dollhouse"
Character: Last year, I dressed up as a doll from Joss Whedon's show, Dollhouse. The show features around this underground corporation that takes "volunteers" and programs them into human dolls in exchange for 5 unconscious years of their lives and money that would set them for life. They partake in engagements with clients that usually are looking for a love interest (again, I dressed up as a partial prostitute.) But sometimes they were asked to be spies or investigators in crime. They were programmed with amazing fighting and analytical skills. In one sense they can fend for themselves as dolls, and another they're trapped. When they're in a "sleep state," having zero personality chips and skills, they're in a daze. They're like children with less energy and intelligence. So, when a serial killer, Alpha, gets loose and slashes the dolls faces, they're left traumatized, confused and helpless poking dead bodies, telling their bodyguards, "They won't wake up."Costume: Fake fresh scars, mainstream make up, lacy tank top, skinny jeans, and healed boots. I was working on a film set that day, so I kept it minimal. I wanted to look attractive, but creepy, and ready to kick butt. Because of my scars, I'd actually get people asking me, "What happened to you?" "Bad weekend..." And then I'd walk away with their mouths gaped. My friends would have to reassure them that it was just make up.
I'm not sure what I'm going to dress up as this year. Thinking of the Girl with the Green Ribbon from the same book of scary stories for kids as "In a dark dark house..."
Who inspires you? Halloween is about being someone else for a day. Don't be lame. Transform. I'm saying this more as a creative. There's nothing wrong with looking sexy, but have a real costume, damnit! At least make an attempt, man.
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